my struggle with discipline
I am in an ongoing battle with mastering self-discipline or lack thereof in my life. I have discovered that the only way to create discipline, personally, is through a consistent routine. I’ve resorted to setting an alarm for every hour to ensure max productivity throughout my day. I look back at my childhood and wonder, did I always lack self-discipline? After some thought, I deduced that the answer is both yes and no. Individually I was a tad bit lackluster but because I had such a strong structure, it wasn’t made apparent until now. My routine was school, dance, homework, sleep, and repeat 🔂. At one point I was dancing in school and after school at two different dance studios. I was consistently dancing. Now that that structure has somewhat dissipated in adulthood; I find myself scrambling. In this scramble, I have realized that I, Ashanti Emmanuel, need a consistent routine with very little free time 😂. Free time meaning unscheduled time. Even my self-care time/days are in my planner 🤷. I’ve discovered that my mind wanders and not always in a positive way when I have nothing to do. Free time for me tends to lead to a mild depression; I will just lay in bed all day and think about the past, things I wish I could do/relive, things I want to happen faster etc. Thoughts of a millennial not satisfied with their current state of life (whoa is me 😅🙄). Free time < productivity.
Honest Moment: Around May 2017, I had reached a place in my life where I no longer wanted a 9-5 office job. I was miserable 😓😥 !!! I wanted to dance every day like I used to, to better my craft and work in the field of my passion. My solution was to go back to school and get my Master’s degree. When you’re in school, you have what? A SCHEDULE 😩😂😅!! (Side note: if I could, I would go back to school right now 😅) As opposed to taking classes here and there at a studio, being in a dance program at a university affords you the ability to take classes every day. It provides a routine based structure in which I thrive (unless I’m overwhelmed but that’s for another post). If such things are not in place, it leads to me being lazy. Yes, I said it; I am lazy! Quite unfortunate but I am admitting my truth. There is a component of procrastination in there, but let’s call it what it is. Procrastination 👿 is just a term utilized to sugarcoat laziness, for me at least. In this life, I can not afford to give myself time to be lazy. Therefore, if you hang around me today and you hear my alarm going off every two hours, it is because I have created an accountability system for myself. However, you can set all the alarms on your phone, if you don’t want to do it you will not do it (that’s an internal struggle you would have to figure out on your own #selfawareness). When I see the alarm, there is no excuse for why that action or task wasn’t completed today PERIOD.
resiliency ➡ consistency ➡ discipline
There will be days where you go astray but at least you have a system to get you back on track. If you are diligent, persistent and consistent your routine will form into a habit. It will be second nature to you as though it were ingrained in your system as a part of your DNA. Discipline comes from consistency and consistency comes from resiliency. The ability to tackle your obstacles head-on without allowing it to overwhelm you and wreak havoc is the embodiment of being resilient. Resiliency is needed as a foundation for consistency. It aids in preparing you for surprises in life that may throw you off kilter. However, a subtle change in perspective such as your diction (word choice) can make a world of a difference. For example, “Oh I didn’t plan for this to happen but let me adapt, adjust and re-prioritize around this unplanned event.” As the famous saying goes, “sometimes you got to roll with the punches.” This solution enables you to turn a challenging day into a productive one. Especially days when you are not in alignment, physically, spiritually or mentally.
I have learned that emotions can either be a blessing or a detriment. It depends on how much power you allow your emotions to have, cliche but true. I have difficulty controlling my emotions and have often given them the allowance to hinder my progress. I remedy this situation by consistently “journaling” and permitting myself to feel. This ensures that I validate and give importance to my emotions without going down the rabbit hole. That’s when things go awry and I want to prevent that. This is what I am working on bettering. I hope this helps if you’re experiencing the same struggle. If you have any comments or suggestions, please scroll down and write them below. Click that like button, share and make sure you subscribe for more content from me. Follow me on all social media, @dancetravels. Have a blessed day lovelies, until next time!